Thursday, July 10, 2014

First Moon Kit

Both Shanti and myself have tween girls in the midst.  Inevitably, this means that "moon time" or "menstruation" is looming on the horizon.  

Enter the First Moon Kit!!

I remember getting my period at age 12…my mother had talked about it a little bit, about finding blood "down there", and thinking she was bleeding to death, running to her own mother to tell her, (and subsequently having her mother laugh at her).  
Still…we only had one conversation about it, and it was never spoken of again…except for what I read in Judy Bloom books.  
I got mine at a friends house, and I remember feeling such fear.  I told my friend I was sick and needed to call my mom to come and get me.  It was, (horrifyingly), my father who went out and bought me a JUMBO box of no name pads, (that came in one size…BULK)!!!  I felt so embarrassed, and the subject of this was never brought up again in my home.

For my own daughters I don't want them to feel any embarrassment or shame when their own moon time comes.  
I'd like to find a way to honour this transition into womanhood, without too much fanfare, (as my eldest is a bit private about such things).  
So, my thoughts came to making a "First Moon Kit"…
something special to have on hand for when that day arrives.
This is what I've come up with so far...

First thing…this book found HERE
This is the most incredible book for young girls about to enter their moontime.
Lucy speaks about menstruation in such a positive light, and offers such great wisdom.
Every mother of a tween age girl should have this book on hand.
(Lucy is also the author of "The Rainbow Way"…she's an amazing lady).

And then…the bulk of the kit…
organic pads and intimate wipes.
(these could also be reusable cloth pads…menstrual cups.)
Before getting this, have a talk with your daughter about what she might like to use and have those things on hand.

A dear friend told me that her own mother gave her bubble bath when she got her first period, 
so I added some bubble bath and organic dark chocolate.

Raspberry Leaf tea, and moonstone earrings.
The earrings will be her first piece of fine jewellery.

Some other suggestions made by friends are…

Hylands homeopathic menstrual cramp remedy
A journal and a pen
New Moon magazine
Clary Sage, Lavendar and other Essential Oils
Rice Bag
Permission slips to cry or be unreasonable
Cozy slippers
Lip Balm and other pampering items

I love that I will have all these wonderful "gifts" for whenever this day arrives.
All of the things I bought will "keep" in the closet for a year or two with no issues.

Would love to hear your stories…wisdom…or suggestions for those of us entering this phase in our mothering adventures!

With love and light



  1. I think this is a lovely idea, my girls are a bit younger so I've a while to wait, but I'll remember this.

  2. Beautiful - I have two little girls who are both a way off this time, but I've been thinking a lot lately about how to approach things.

    I hope when the day arrives it is a beautiful, not scary time for your daughter.

  3. Love this idea! I actually just recently bought moonstone earrings exactly like that. I'm going to give them to my daughter when she has her first moon after seeing your idea here. :)

  4. Our daughter must be about the same age as your daughters so we are also waiting for "the big day". Most of her friends have already started at 10 and 11 years of age (much younger than in my day) but she is happy to be the last one to reach the milestone! They have had several lessons at school and we talk openly about all of the "body science" stuff so she knows what to expect (as much as you can prepare at that young age!) The one thing I remember about when I first started getting periods is how heavy my periods were back then, so I recommend some thicker pads than the liners. I'm SO glad to see that you will be using the Natracare products, I have been using the pads for the past 5 years and feel so much safer using them over the "other brands". I hadn't heard of the moon reference before but my daughter is like her Mama and is all about gemstones and jewelry, so this is a great idea!
    Great post!

  5. Thank you SO much for sharing my books. I am deeply honoured.

    1. Lucy, your book is one of the best resources I've found for young women about to enter this phase in their lives. Thank YOU for writing it!

  6. Such a sweet idea, I think I would have love it!

  7. Hey Maureen.
    I love this idea. Despite having gone through it with two older girls, this seems like such a great way to usher in this rite of passage.

  8. Bravo for taking this approach. My mother barely spoke of it, and it was an awkward conversation at best. Three older brothers were no help. I have no sisters and no daughter, so that one experience was the end of it. Wish I'd had a mother as understanding as you. I must say, though, that I'm a little uncomfortable with the pampering aspect. When I was a teen I used to get horrific cramps, headaches, even threw up a few times. I used to go to school and homeroom to get credit for attending school, but spent a good bit of my first day in the nurse's office, wallowing in self pity. Then I happened on an article (written by a male doctor!) that essentially said cramps are psychosomatic--you spend 3 weeks anticipating feeling miserable, then a week fulfilling that prophecy, then start again. But, there's no real reason for cramps. I decided then and there that I wasn't going to suffer pain that wasn't real, and I began talking myself out of them. I used aspirin as a placebo for a few months, and then they were gone for good. Spent the rest of my life, until menopause, nearly pain free.
    I think it would be better to teach girls to take their periods in stride and not let them hinder them in any way. We're amazingly strong when we want to be. Any woman who has given birth knows that. I'd skip the pampering and push positive thinking. And maybe how to deal with the "oops" situations.
    As an adult, I also made a decision, after listening to endless whining about hot flashes, never to burden others with whining about my hot flashes. I think once you open your mouth to complain about how you feel, whether it's cramps or hot flashes, it reinforces the suffering in your mind. Best to push it out of your mind and move on. Frankly, nobody is interested in your periods or your hot flashes, or any other complaints. Keep it to yourself and gracefully move on. If a bit of pampering with something that comforts you helps you refocus your energy to positive thoughts, then by all means have that little arsenal of weapons. But don't use it as an excuse to wallow in self pity. You can think yourself into a great deal of pain very easily. I know, I've been there.

    1. I think this perspective is really interesting. I'm a bit of a pamperer by nature…totally into comfort and feeling good. I agree with you though…as women we are so strong and SO capable of handling pain. Not only in childbirth, but we also handle the yearly stuff like colds and flus remarkably better than our male counterparts, (at least in my own experience I find this to be true)!
      A good addition to what I wrote above would be to use this time as a reminder to our daughters of how incredibly strong and resilient their bodies are. Thank you for taking the time to write to us!

  9. Wonderful and lovely ideas. Maureen. I've been co-creating a box i've call a butterfly box, for each of my girls. My close circle of friends and some female family members have contributed a note and token to this box (journals, crystals, jewelery, art), to be gifted at time of my girls' menarche.

    I already gave them Lucy's amazing book, as I wanted them to feel empowered by the wisdom prior to that day, "Reaching for the Moon" has ideas that nurture girls' blossoming prior to actual menarche.

    I've chosen not to include any hygiene products in the box (except bubble bath) as I don't want to place much emphasis on the "cleanliness" aspects of this day, Although I will be giving them these things separately of course.

    I thank you and honor you for opening this powerful thread on your site, for the sake of your daughters AND our girls everywhere. No more shall we trivialize the significance of this powerful time in our daughters' lives. It's time to raise them up higher than we were ... to celebrate Earth's daughters, their gifts of creativity beyond the power of reproduction.


    1. A butterfly box!!! LOVE it! I know I have close women friends who love my daughter, and who want to be a part of this, so I've been wondering how to involve them…this is a perfect idea!! Thank you!!

  10. 1stly i want 2 thank you for printing this article - since, as you well know, our mothers didn't want any real mention of it as it wasn't "accepted". i've found many books and aritcles since my own research (i have a daughter that i know is close!), and have been fascinated to know about the red tent in native american society & how "accepting" that was! anyhew, i've decided to give her a moon pendant in honor of her moon-cycle, along with some artist stationary, the Hyland PMS homeopathic tablets, and we already have the raspberry loose leaf tea (but the packets are great for having on-hand-easy-use!). i've been trying to decide between a few books, but will go ahead with the one you suggested since it is so highly recommended. thank you again & blessed-be!

  11. In my family, it is traditional for a girl to get her ears pierced after her first moon as well as a ring from her grandmother (mine is white gold with sapphires and diamonds). I also have a lovely red fleece caplet that was given to me at my menarche (first moon) ceremony. It is a great comfort at times. The bubble bath is a wonderful idea. It might also be useful to look into a mood balancing tea or a cramp tea (we have a local apothecary and I use their house made teas).

  12. Hi, Just found your blog! What perfect timing. Might I also suggest a small calendar for her to record the dates?

  13. Great idea. I'm "pinning" this for later use as my oldest is 9, and a physically immature 9 at that, so thinking I have a couple of years up my sleeve. But with 5 daughters, it is bound to be a significant thing in our house. Love the ear piercing idea foxtail shared too. I've been getting nagged about the ears for a while now so that's a great idea.
    One thing I will say, while I love my cup I think it would have been a little intimidating when I was 12. I didn't even manage tampons till I was older. I also had incredibly heavy periods, as someone else mentioned, for the first 2-4 years or so. I don't think anyone really understood or appreciated how difficult that was. So it'd be good to have some heavy duty stuff on hand too. :)

  14. Love your post! These are fantastic ideas! Thank you so much for writing this. My niece just started and I wanted ideas to send her a care package to celebrate her growing body. I'm going to send her chocolate, a period tracker bracelet and the book you recommended. :) I plan to do this for all my nieces and my own daughter when they start their first moon.


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