Recently our internet went down for a couple weeks. At first it seemed to be such an inconvenience and had me feeling some real “withdrawals”.
As time went on though, I felt myself feeling so present to my life, so productive and just plain free!
After it reconnected I realized I was left with some fresh perspective.
It helped me to honestly and humbly admit to myself how much of my real life was being given to my online life. It also helped me to consider the addiction that the internet world can be and to recognize my tendency to use time on line as an escape of sorts. ouch.
So I decided it was time to give up the internet completely ~ the blog, other blogs, facebook... all of it and just sink my teeth into life! I felt done sacrificing time with my girls, my love and myself to be on line. I spoke with Maureen about all of this and she shared that she had been feeling similar. We agreed it was time to jut let it all go and focus on our personal lives with more dedication and attention.
But then the flip flopping began…
Can I/ we really just let go of it all… Is this the right thing to do….
On and on my head hummed.
So I took this indecision and decided to run with it. literally. (I have recently started running again and find this time of my day is truly medicine for my soul ~ it seems to calm the chatter in my brain long enough for my intuition to be heard) And after one of these runs I finally had real clarity. My inner wisdom seemed to say that what I really needed to do was to learn discipline. That there was no need to be so extreme in my decisions but rather a need to use this new found clarity as an opportunity to exercise discipline in my life.
Life as a blogging/homeschooling/working mama is such an intricate dance and requires real balance (something I feel I have been lacking) in order to be productive and peaceful.
But I feel there is a way.
So I am setting out on a journey to find balance. A journey that I hope can allow me to feed my love of being creative and being inspired by all of your creativity ~ while keeping myself focused and fully present to my moment to moment life.
One of the first steps I have taken was to buy myself an egg timer. I decided it will live next to the computer and will be wound up to a reasonable time each time I go on line and when that bell goes off… it is time to get off! Whether I feel “done” or not.
I also decided that my time on line should be reserved for times when I know all my priorities are in check ~ after my life has been fed, my homeschooling is done, I have made time for myself to be active and I have had quality time interacting with the life around me!
I am grateful for the gift of my unintended internet fast and plan to revisit it again ~ whenever I feel like my real life is taking a backseat.
I have been so inspired by the creative beauty being shared daily in this big bloggy world. I value being a part of this kindred spirit community and look forward to continuing sharing in it ~ with a new found commitment to moderation and discipline!
So I put this question to all you blogging mamas out there ~ How do you do it? How do you foster balance in your full lives?
Maureen & I welcome any words of wisdom you can pass our way….
~ Shanti ~